Chapter Two

By that evening Laura had gotten all of her belongings stowed or organized and had even put up some posters. Around six o' clock Abby began thinking about going to dinner, but truth be told she really didn't want to face the the dining hall again. She couldn't have explained exactly why, but she just didn't want to. She briefly considered asking Laura if she wanted to go with her, but decided that the potential awkwardness would not really be worth it. After another 10 minutes or so Laura took her purse and started to leave. When she reached the door she turned around.

"Hey, I'm going to dinner, would you like to come?" she asked. For a second Abby was seriously tempted to say yes to that. For reasons that were not completely known even to her though, she shook her head.

"No thanks, I um, I'm not really that hungry. Big lunch you know."

"Oh, ok, see you after a while then." Laura closed the door behind her and finally Abby was left alone in their room. She turned around slowly in place, not completely sure what to do with herself now that she had the room to herself. She thought about lying down, but didn't want to mess her bed up yet. Instead she sat at her desk and opened one of the drawers. Her mother had sent a couple of boxes of granola bars and cans of juice with her to snack on. That would take the place of dinner for tonight.

Abby sat in front of her computer and logged into AIM and Facebook to see if any of her friends were online. She immediately saw that Ashley had been leaving wall messages for her boyfriend on Facebook and most of them were of the "luv u, baby" type. No messages for Abby though. She quickly closed the window. One of her friends that had gone to another school was signed onto AIM so Abby said hi.

"Hey, how's it going?" asked Melanie.

"Ok I guess. It's different. What's up with you?"

"Not much, got all unpacked today."

"Sweet, me too," typed Abby.

"You like Purdue?"

"Haven't seen much of it yet. But it seems to be alright."

"Cool. Well I gotta go, it's dinner time here. TTYL," said Melanie.

"K, see ya," answered Abby as her friend signed off. There was really no one else online at the moment that she really wanted to talk to, so Abby went offline as well. She closed the screen on her laptop and sat there for several minutes, staring at the bulletin board on the wall over her desk. As the sun sank lower in the sky the light coming through their East facing window began to fade. It was far too early to go to bed, but Abby had no idea of what else she could do. After a few more minutes, she finally decided to go ahead and take a shower. She was reminded of her earlier urge to cry while in the dining hall.

At the time she had been slightly surprised at the feeling. She'd never thought of herself as being overly emotional, and she certainly didn't often feel overwhelmed by a need to burst into tears. Now that she was alone, she doubted that she would in fact cry. The feeling had faded and been swallowed. To cry now would feel silly. She gathered her robe, shower sandals, and bath supplies together and, locking the room behind her, went down the hall to the communal wash room.

For the moment it was deserted; whether that was because everyone was at dinner, or because not all the residents of the floor had moved in yet she didn't know, but she was relieved regardless. The loneliness was still churning in her stomach, but the idea of being forced to meet and get to know a whole new set of strangers was an even more unpleasant prospect.

Again, Abby questioned where those feelings were coming from. She'd always been somewhat shy, but not anti-social. Of course she was in the shower. Hardly ever the prime, or least awkward spot for getting to know brand new friends.

"It's just that it's been a stressful day. This is my first time away from home and I don't know anybody yet. This is normal," Abby reassured herself. "I'm ok. Maybe tomorrow will be better."

*****

08-24-08

Met my roommate yesterday. I guess she seems alright. It's been a little weird. I'm not at all sure what to say to her. I mean, we're going to be stuck together for a few months so it seems like it would be intelligent to get along, it's just been weird. Last night after I showered she was already back from dinner and I didn't know what to do when I was ready to get into my PJs. I didn't want to just strip down right there in front of her, but what was I supposed to do? Go back to one of the shower stalls? That wouldn't seem strange at all!

I ended up just sort of turning the other direction and putting on my pants under my robe then switching that for a t-shirt real quick. She wasn't like staring at me or anything, but it was still weird!

On the bright side, we went to breakfast together and it wasn't nearly as awkward as I thought it might be. She's in pre-pharmacy so we talked about that for a little while. I think it might be ok. Mom called today to see how I was. I didn't tell her everything, but I did tell her that I was feeling kind of lonely. She suggested that I introduce myself to some people. Seems like a decent enough solution on the surface, but much harder to set into action in reality.

Anyway, I'm kind of nervous and kind of excited about tomorrow. I have three classes and they're all in the morning. I found all of the buildings that I'm going to on my map, so I think I'll be able to get to them ok. I'd hate to be that person who has to ask for directions, but I'm sure if I did someone would be able to point me in the right direction. But I'd like to avoid that if I can. I prefer not to look like a complete idiot when I can avoid it.

I wonder how Ash is doing... I miss her and it still hurts so bad. I don't know what to do. I guess mom might tell me that I should try to contact her, but I don't know that I want to do that. She's the one that started it afterall. I didn't do anything! At least I don't think I did. Apparently Dave is just way more important than I am, even though I've known her for years and years and she's only been dating him for a few months now.

I just don't know why I don't matter anymore. I mean, what did I do?

*****

"Hey, I'm going to go get dinner with a couple friends," Laura informed Abby cheerfully. "Guess I'll see you later tonight. Have a good evening."

"Ok, you too; talk to you later," said Abby. She didn't mind that Laura hadn't invited her along because today she'd actually managed to reach two of her old friends that were also at Purdue and they had arranged to meet in Earhart to eat together. Abby was excited about the prospect and more than a little relieved that she wouldn't have to sit through dinner alone tonight. Neither of the girls that she'd heard back from had been very, very close with her in high school, but maybe they were feeling as isolated as she was, and at least they had bothered to respond. Just knowing that made Abby feel a little better.

All day long other girls on the floor had been coming by their door to meet and greet. Earlier there had been a floor meeting where the RA had gone over all the rules for the hall and then they'd all decorated a brick for themselves. That's right, a brick. It was to prop their door open with so there was a little circulation in the room. Abby didn't like the idea of having to leave her door open all the time, in fact it would be fair to say that she hated the prospect, but it had been stifling in their room the night before. The Windsor halls were so old that they were very nearly outdated.

"Hey there!" shouted a voice from the door, making Abby jump and spin around in her chair. A girl that she'd never seen before in her life stood in her room. "Are you Abby or Laura?"

"Abby," Abby stammered, rising from her seat and wondering what the hell gave people the idea that they could just walk into any room with an open door.

"Awesome, I live down the hall there. Is this your first year here?"

"Yes."

"Excellent, are you excited?"

"Yes."

"Well I'm going to dinner, I'll come by later and we can chat!" With that the girl spun and left Abby's room. Abby stood there for a moment. Her first thought was the she didn't really want to be there for the return of... And then her second thought was that What's-Her-Face hadn't given a name. At least all the other people had bothered to knock on the door frame before they came waltzing in.

Abby checked the time on her alarm clock and quickly grabbed her purse to head to Earhart. Locking the room door behind her Abby ran down the stairs and out the back entrance to cross the parking lot. This was her first time going to the Earhart Dining Court, but she'd looked at her map and it was only a very short jaunt away. The plan was to meet her friends at the front entrance. As she crossed Jischke Drive she thought once again of Ash, but quickly shoved it to the back of her mind. It was pointless to think about it.

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Word count: 1,703
Total word count: 3,455